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Lord, before I lay me down to sleep
I pray for a man, who's not a creep;
One who's handsome, smart and strong,
One who's willy is thick and long.

One who thinks before he speaks,
When he promises to call, he won't wait weeks.
I pray that he is gainfully employed,
and when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.

Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows just what to say, when I ask "How big's my behind?"

One who'll make love till my body's a twitchin,
In the hall, the loo, the garden and kitchen!
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And never attempt to shag my best friend.

And as I kneel and pray to my bed,
I look at the creep you sent me instead.

Amen.