Jokes Rating: ( 76 votes )
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A man walks into a bar with a smallish dog and sits at the rail.

The bartender hurries over and tells him that the dog will have to go!

The man replies that this is no ordinary dog! No, this is a talking dog.

The bartender is about to throw both of them out when the dog says, "I just want a damn beer! Who do I have to kill to get a fricken beer around here?"

The bartender is momentarily flustered but then he says, "Man, you are great ventriloquist but as I said I don't serve dogs!"

The man says, "Tell you what buddy, put yer money where yer mouth is. I'll go to the can and we'll both put up 10 bucks. If the dog don't talk to ya you keep the money and we'll leave."

Both men slap 10 bucks on the bar and our hero waddles off to the bathroom.

The bartender stares at the dog for a minute and then the dog says, "Well am I gonna get my beer numbnuts?" The shocked bartender turns around to get the beer but when he turns back the dog is gone!

A few minutes later the guy comes out of the bathroom and see his dog is missing! "Where is my dog!?!?!?!" The bartender shrugs and the man rushes out to find his valuable dog.

He is searching frantically and finally he spots the dog way up at the end up dead end alley. When he gets closer he sees that the dog is grinding away behind a very bored looking but huge cat!

The man says " Rex! What the hell are you doing? You NEVER did this before!" And the dog says, "well I never had 20 bucks before."